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Grocery Store Disaster

Disaster might be a bit of an exaggeration, but last Friday I was the parent flipping-out at her kids in the produce department. Yes, that was me.

I should have known that it would not be an easy trip to the grocery store. The boys and I went to pick up a few things after their sports class at the Y. A class where they played “Duck, Duck, Goose” to end the session. Where my two tykes chased each other, full-tilt, around the gym like little Tasmanian Devils on steroids…Need I say more?

I’m not sure if it was the hot weather, lunch-hour, full moon, sports class or anything else, but Benjamin and Nicholas were just a wee-bit excited. We had a chat about good behavior, they both bobble-headed me their consent, and off we went into the store. Wah-wah-wah…

I should have known better AND saved my breath.

I was perusing the produce aisle for dill (which I never did find), and within arm’s reach of my ill-behaved offspring. Benjamin (see, I’m using his full name because he was just in that much trouble!), managed to pull the cart (loaded with groceries!!) over sideways. Yes, over sideways towards him and his brother! Thankfully, it hit a produce stand at about a 45 degree angle, effectively trapping both boys, (like two naughty little monkeys), but at least not squishing them.

I was not impressed. After righting the cart, both boys got a serious lecture in French, to the probable dismay of curious onlookers, who I am sure were totally judging me to be a crummy parent. Then, Nicholas was made to sit in the front seat of the cart, to which he whined “But Mommy, the seat is for babies!!” Babies, eh? Well, guess what kiddo….!!! Benjamin had to super-glue his hand to the cart for the remainder of our time in the store.

Ugh.

They did manage to turn it all around though. At one point Nicholas noticed a woman walking by. She was wearing a bright orange shirt and a skirt with the same colored flowers. She looked sweet and summery, like a human-sized orange creamsicle. Nicholas said, “Mommy, that lady is pretty.”

The lady heard him. She turned around, gave Nicholas a big smile, and said, “Thank you!” with a giggle to herself.

“That was very nice Nicholas,” said I.

Well Ben, seeing this exchange, said, “Mommy, I think that you are the prettiest. You should buy yourself jewelry, because you deserve ‘lots of jewelry.” Seriously. I just can’t make this stuff up.

Uh-huh. Good move, kid. Remember that one for when you are in trouble with your future-wife.

xo Naomi

P.S. Since we’re talking about groceries (sort of), here’s my new go-to summer recipe for kebabs. I usually add chicken-apple sausage from Costco to mine, but it’s delicious without. Colorful and summery!!

Shrimp and Mango Skewers with Guava-Lime Glaze on Epicurious

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